Iâ€™m tired of battling folks about the secularization of Christmas! Itâ€™s not only wearisome, itâ€™s mind-bogglingly stupid!
Taking Christ out of Christmas is like taking the tires off your car and then having the whole family climb in for a Sunday drive. It doesnâ€™t work. How long is our society going to be caught up in this ridiculous â€œEmperor and His Clothes,â€ politically correct culture?
I guess if you canâ€™t beatâ€™m you should just joinâ€™m, right?
Ok, I’m gonna give it a shot. Why donâ€™t we call Independence Day, â€œFireworks Day?â€ Iâ€™m sure there are some folks in England who still might get their feelings hurt about what went down in 1776!
While weâ€™re at it we could change Motherâ€™s Day and Fatherâ€™s Day to â€œParentâ€™s Day.â€ Theyâ€™re already doing this in the California school systemâ€”why should Ahhhhnold have all the fun terminating tradition? Letâ€™s all have a crack at it! The options are almost limitless. Letâ€™s see, we could changeâ€¦
Labor Day to â€œPlay Day,â€ so we donâ€™t offend everyone who doesnâ€™t really want to workâ€¦
Valentineâ€™s Day to, â€œSignificant Other Day,â€ because Saint Valentine was such a traditionalist when it came to marriage being between a man and a womanâ€¦
Thanksgiving to, â€œEntitlement Day,â€ because we donâ€™t really need to be thankful for things we have a right to in the first place!â€¦
We could change Easter to â€œNational Bunny Day,â€ and everyone could exchange eggs (very carefully) with one another and buy pet rabbitsâ€¦
We could change George Washingtonâ€™s Day and Abraham Lincolnâ€™s B-Day to â€œPresidents Dayâ€ so as not to offend other presidents who may have done little or even harmed our country, but at leastâ€”
Cross that one offâ€¦already been done.
We could change New Yearâ€™s Day to simply, â€œYearâ€™s Day,â€ because we donâ€™t want to offend the Old year?â€¦
Columbus Day to, America Day, oops, not popular right now. How about â€œHollywood Dayâ€ because Iâ€™m sure theyâ€™ll take credit for it in an upcoming film anyway!
Veteranâ€™s Day of course, would have to go. Everyone knows those boys in Iraq are just there to secure our oil interests and our troops in Afghanistan just want to see far away places and try new and exotic foods (please tell me you can actually feel the sarcasm through your computer screen). We could call it â€œSean Penn Day.â€ He seems to need recognition in the worst kind of way.
And why limit it to our traditional holidays? We could change our money from saying, â€œIn God we trust,â€ to â€œTrust No one!â€ That seems more of a cultural fit right now.
Man, Iâ€™m on a roll! Somebody stop me!
But thatâ€™s just it, nobody will, because everyoneâ€™s afraid to rock the boat. Wanna know why?
Because itâ€™s the Titanic.
Everyone knows itâ€™s going down, but no one wants to actually play the role of the iceberg! So Iâ€™ll start.
Here it comesâ€¦
Dare I say it?!
I think I willâ€¦
Am I still here?
Thank You Jesus!